Idols

Cairistiona and I have been working on changing and decorating my office. It used to be a community space. We have moved the extra computer and copier to another room and are working on making a "homie" environment that is welcoming when people are visiting with me. I think it is starting to look pretty good.

There are a few people here at the church who do not like change. In fact, it really frustrates them. There are a lot of plaques on the walls and on different items that have been donated. There is even one plaque on the cross at the front of the Sanctuary. This really bugs me. How do we find ourselves in a place where the physical things in the church building hold so much value to us? Isn't this a place that is supposed to be set aside to worship the Lord? Instead it has become a historical land site to remember loved ones. To me it feels border line idolitry.

I know that long term change takes time. However, this is an area that needs to be addressed. Lord, please help me to know how to approach it in order to have a positive, God honoring, result.

Spiritual Companionship

     This week we have been reading and discussion what it means to be a spiritual director and the need for spiritual companionship. This resonates so true with me. As I have accepted this pastoral position, moved from Denver, and are constantly meeting new people, I have discovered their is a bit of a void without those deep companionships. I long to have a spiritual friend who I can share my dreams with. One who enjoys the activities I enjoy.
    This was hard for me at first as well because I desire for God to be all I need. But then I began to remember that God created us to be in community. It is a part of who we are. And so I begin to pray for God to bring those types of connections here into my life.
     I think it is important to note that I am super thankful that my closest spiritual friend, my wife, is with me. Moving to Iowa has been completely different than when I moved to Ireland. I am blessed to have a family with me and to not be alone. Thank you Lord for this incredible blessing!

Preaching

I have been preaching now for about three weeks. Not three weeks straight, but three weeks in a row. I have found it rather amazing how God continues to give me what I need in order speak on a Sunday morning. I was originally very worried about content and the amount of content. My biggest fear was irrelevancy. However, up to this point, God has provided me with so much content. Today I actually had to cut out about have of my message because it was too long.

After the service, several people have spoken to me about how God was using what I said to speak into their lives. This is incredible. I really appreciate that they do not simply say, "hey that was a good job." They tell me what I said and how it is applicable to their lives. This is God at work. I cannot do this apart from Him (Jn 15).

I am sure as time goes on I will have seasons both good and bad when it comes to messages. Thankfully it is the Holy Spirit at work in the lives of people, and not dependent on just me. I trust He will continue to guide and direct me as I seek direction on what to speak on. Thank you Lord for your faithfulness!

I don't like being sick

It is now the second week of living in Iowa, and I am sick for the second time. I am really hoping that this is not a trend for me. I am sure it won't be, but still. 

Stepping into the role if pastor I have felt that I am stepping I to what I have always been called to. The last two years have been long. We have felt in limbo not sure where we belong. Although the transition to a new place has its difficulties, and the church had its issues, I am confident this is whee we are supposed to be. 

Transformational leadership has been an incredible aid for this step in my life. Although I miss the old cohort, I am thankful to have taken a year off. God works all things to the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose. 

What has given me the most anxiety has been Sunday morning messages. My greatest fear is to he irrelevant. Lord in pray you will help me to speak in such a way that people are drawn to you and you alone. I am thankful that my classes have aided me in content and direction. The cool thing is I am not doing it on purpose. God places in my heart the need to speak on identity. The last classes with Tony have spoken directly into this topic. God is good. 

Week One

I am finishing up my first week if being a sr pastor. It has been pretty much what I expected up to this point. It seems every church has its own quirks, but they also seem to be synonymous with issues from  churches I have served in the past. 

After everything is said and done, I am so full of joy. I am tired, but ready and excited for the adventure. I know this is what I am supposed to be doing and am glad to be in a place to fulfill Gods call on my life. It has its challenges, and my family is struggling still to translation. However, it is good. God is good. 

Back in the saddle again

It is really nice to be back in school. Life this past year has changed drastically for us. God has been preparing us for something new for about two years now, and we are just now in the cusp of a brand new adventure. 

In one week, the family and I will be moving to IA for our first pastorate. Although it is difficult to leave friends and family, I could not have more peace that this is God at work. He has prepared us for this moment in time. Scary? Yes. Exciting? Absolutely. 

God has plans far beyond ours. This is evident everywhere. What a joy it is to have the grace to walk with Him in this adventure. Glory he to god forever. 

Back to it... Full of uncertainty

The summer is over and now it's time to start back into the masters program. Over the course of the summer, we discovered that the federal government np longer offers aid to Barclay. We began classes, and I still do not have a way planned to pay for my schooling. I tried to apply for a student loan through chase bank, but was denied.

Other parts of my summer that have not been awesome are all a result of my misbehaving. God needs to be first in my life and he is not. I feel disconnected from the Spirit of God and the terrifies me. Here I am supposed to be the spiritual leader of our home and I am lost in the wilderness trying to keep up the facade.

But, here I am,  journaling for school praying that God will bring me back too him. Praying to once again understand his love. Praying to be the man of God he has called me go be. Praying that I will once again be obedient.